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Sep 17th 2019, 07:17 AM   #76
 ZXtasy's Avatar
  Jan 2016
  Moses Lake, WA

  2013 Kawasaki Concours C-14, 2005 ZX-10R Kawasaki (Nekkid), '99 Yamaha TW-200
That is one club no one wants to be a member of, and we don't even get jackets....losing our children. It has been 14 years since I put my dear Sage in the dirt, and it aches every day. Just finished reading a fantastic book, you know the kind that rips the bandage off exposing the always bleeding wound and then works at filling in the hole for a bit longer with good stuff. 'Bearing the Unbearable', Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, ( I know, it makes you want to get some Italian food by the end.) I would send you my tear stained copy but my wife is still reading it, it's on Amazon.

You've got this...
DarthVader likes this.
Oct 25th 2019, 01:01 PM   #77
 DarthVader's Avatar
  Mar 2016
  Maple Falls

  '02 ZX6R is an update on how I am doing...

1st...picked up a new to me bike. as the 6R was in reality her bike, so every time I was out on it, it reminded me of that day. (got a 2010 ZX14)

2nd..I am moving forward in life and trying to live life with no regrets.
as they say in a movie, get busy livin' or get busy diein' trying to do more than just exist, trying to live again. wish me luck on this one!

3rd..have not been to crash sight in a while...trying to look forward and
not dwell on the past, as the past(the crash) just brings me down in total sadness.(I may stop by in Dec. when I am in oregon)

I still have my days I break down a little, but they are far fewer now. I dont think a day has gone by since the crash that I have not thought of her...but by going to Detroit area this past summer has helped with knowing who she was a little better. and this in turn has helped me to move forward in life without her. and the question now is: will I ever get close to someone again like I did with her?...not sure on this one.

thank you all for the support this past year since this all has taken has helped me more than you'll ever know.

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Edited by DarthVader on Oct 25th 2019 at 01:04 PM
Oct 25th 2019, 01:31 PM   #78
 1shinysideup's Avatar
  Jan 2016

Glad to hear your doing a little better, I'm sorry this happened to you and wish you nothing but the best I truly mean it. What you experienced is unimaginable and will take time, it's awesome you didn't just roll over and give up, that's the easy way out.
Oct 25th 2019, 06:15 PM   #79
 ZXtasy's Avatar
  Jan 2016
  Moses Lake, WA

  2013 Kawasaki Concours C-14, 2005 ZX-10R Kawasaki (Nekkid), '99 Yamaha TW-200
Thank you.

Thank you for the updates, and for the candidness.

On Item #1: Good on you! We had to get rid of my wife's SV-650 that my daughter was riding when she died even though we all loved that bike, and even a different one was out of the question. As for the new ride, Horsepower is a freaking awesome tonic for grief.

On Item #2: As my good friend Andy Dufresne would say..yeah, life will have some regrets no matter how hard we try. Like a battery, it takes some negative to make the positive flow...

On Item #3: Yeah, that is a tough one. Is it necessary? No, but may it be cathartic or give closure? So unique to each situation. We avoided the 'crash scene' for a couple of years although it is on a main N. bound route. The first time I rode by I almost puked in my helmet. Slowly, it became...bearable. Then OK. Now, each year we go out to place flowers; red roses her favorite, and do not break down sobbing. We have been out there with her daughter, her widowed husband, and others. Sobering, but reinforcing of the love we shared. I hope you find something similar.

May I suggest everyone read a beautiful work called "Bearing the Unbearable" by Joanne Cacciatore.

Look me up if ever in the area.
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Dec 26th 2019, 10:25 AM   #80
 DarthVader's Avatar
  Mar 2016
  Maple Falls

  '02 ZX6R
well...second x-mas without her....was a lot easier this year. still sux that she is gone though.....have found myself again enjoying life a little...changed my outlook and priorities...what will the new year bring?
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Dec 26th 2019, 12:01 PM   #81
 MV Man's Avatar
  Sep 2019
  Portlandia, by way of Maui

  MV Agusta F3 800
I wish you well, Darth.
Dec 27th 2019, 08:01 AM   #82
 BabyJordan's Avatar
  Apr 2017
  Renton, Wa

  GSXR 1000
I can't imagine what you are going through. You are in my prayers!!!
Dec 27th 2019, 08:45 AM   #83
  Jul 2016

  2009 DL650 VStrom
I am so sorry for your loss...I can not imagine. Prayers sent.

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